45th & 47th President • The Most Persecuted Man in History • Self-Made Billionaire (Trust Me) • Destroyer of Deep States • Golf Champion • VERY Stable Genius™
MAKE EVERYTHING GREAT AGAIN (AGAIN)The stock market went up at least once. Possibly multiple times. Experts (the right ones) say no president has ever made numbers go more up than him.
Built a massive, beautiful wall. Mexico is paying for it spiritually. The vibes of the wall are 100% funded by Mexico. Sources confirm.
By not thinking about it. Scientists were worried for nothing. The weather is fine. Have you been outside? It's fine. Very fine. Beautiful weather.
Should have won 12 Nobel Prizes according to many people — very smart people. The committee is run by radical left Norwegians or whatever.
Killed the virus by holding a flashlight near his chest during a press briefing. The fake news spun this as a "suggestion to inject bleach." Classic media.
Kim Jong-un sent him a beautiful letter. They are basically best friends. The nuclear situation was completely handled by their vibes. Very warm letters.
More indictments than any president, which proves how innocent he is. Only truly great people get prosecuted this much. Napoleon. Socrates. Trump.
Never loses. Caddies confirm he scores a hole-in-one on roughly every hole. One caddie called it "supernatural." He agreed. Very humble about it.
Trump bravely revealed that windmills cause cancer in the brain of nearby birds, and possibly also of doctors who study bird brain cancer. Big Wind has suppressed this for years. The silence from ornithologists is DEAFENING.
Source: A guy at a rally. Very credible. Unverified in the best way.Trump raised the alarm about sharks possibly eating batteries that fall off electric boats. No one is talking about this. You have to ask yourself: why is the mainstream media protecting the sharks?? Follow the money (to the sharks).
Source: Direct quote. Real. Please look it up.Washington bureaucrats secretly made dishwashers weaker so that you need 10 cycles to clean one fork. Trump heroically freed the dishwashers. This is not a metaphor. He literally talked about dishwashers extensively. Multiple times.
Source: Verified by the American Dishwasher Liberation Front (ADLF)The deep state lowered water pressure in toilets, forcing patriotic Americans to flush 10, 15, or even 18 times per visit. Trump demanded answers. He used the word "flush" 14 times in a single speech. A record.
Source: Multiple rallies. Extensively documented. Absolutely real quotes.